Fitting square pegs in round holes

Look, I’ll tell you this – sometimes, often in fact, I have these moments of clarity where it occurs to me that I don’t fit in, neatly, like, I mean. I admit that I’m a bit odd, even for my tastes and about half the time I’m not even sure what I’m talking about.

Then -

I got into work yesterday and one of my colleagues greeted me over the interoffice chat application and then he said, here is a rhyme for you:

Roses are Red

Dead Flesh is Green

When the Dead start to Rise

I want You on my Team

He said that a friend of his sent it to him and it made him think of me.

Nice, right.

It made me feel like..someone here gets me. It made me feel like…I belong somewhere, here, in fact.

I don’t think I told you, but during my lunch hours I’m learning how to make origami cranes – I finished the paper my niece gave me for Xmas so I went out and bought some new stuff. They are pretty ok, I mean I’m not mangling them any more. My fingers are learning. Slowly, very slowly.

And you know, people come by to see what I’m up to and chat or come over to my desk where the cranes and sitting around, watching things and I figure “Hey, take a crane or two so you can them at your desk!” and people really like them.

So, later the same day, yesterday, another one of my colleagues (who has 4 cranes) suggested the CEO of our company that we take the cranes that I make and put them in a bowl by reception and when people visit us, they can take a crane home with them. Once he stopped laughing, the CEO loved it!

And I had another moment of “People here, they get it.”

And today, today another colleague came over to my desk and asked if I had met his doggie. I hadn’t, so he took me to where his doggie was hanging out. And guess what! It wasn’t a doggie at all! It was a puppy!!!!

A 10-month old, American Eskimo puppy, who was sooooo happy to see us.

I have to tell you, I really felt like, “People, they get me here.”

It just makes me feel so good. About everything.

Hot yoga vs. cupcakes

Sometimes hot yoga wins, sometimes cupcakes win.

This morning, I was all about hot yoga, but by the time work was over, it was all about cupcakes.

I’ve picked up a very dear friend for the past week, getting her in the am and dropping her off in the pm and it has been very enjoyable, tonight I dropped her off in the pm and suddenly, I was compelled to go to the store to get some sparkling wine…so off I went!

Dinner of sparkling wine and turkey meatball subway, ignored the whole “make lunch for the next day” thing and concentrated on making some cupcake batter. Tonight it was all about the Mayan hot chocolate batter and lemon lavender batter…so I only need to put those in the oven on Tuesday night and make up the batter for the champagne cupcakes…I have to admit that I totally messed the champagne up – I was supposed to get sweet champagne and instead I got dry!

I don’t know what I was thinking!

Perhaps I wasn’t at all.

So, I’m currently reading the graphic novel series “The Walking Dead” and I should probably do a proper review of it, but I’m not going to, ok?

I have to tell you that I’m loving it – it brings forward these whole issues of how we react at the end of the world, how we act when there are no laws and no societal mores to govern us…who are we out of context.

And I’m also greatly enjoying the conversation I’m having with the guy who is loaning me the graphic novels – he is not only generous with his things, but also with his willingness to talk about these things that my mind provokes.

Of course, I missed the return of the TV series, but was told, by various and sundry, is that is very good, so excited about that.

In light of my champagne error I made the best of it and started to drink. I’ve made very good progress too – I even drunk-dialed a dear friend of mine that I haven’t seen in ages and now we have plans for Friday. You can think what you want, but sometimes liquidity works.

Things are good right now, keeping busy, staying out of trouble, mostly. And making new friends. And holding onto older ones.

Yes, a pretty fabulous Monday.

And I’m a bit worried that this post makes no sense ‘cuz I’m all drunk…

Quiche and carrot sticks

Spent much of the day struggling with IT issues.

I think if I were a different person it would have been very, very frustration. But, being the person I am, it was actually kind of interesting. I emailed in my problem, got a suggestion and tried it and then a ton of ideas I could think of…nothing worked.

So, I decided to try from home.

It worked!

This means that the problem is about what I guessed it is.

And you know, I should probably be irritated that I keep giving solutions and then being questioned about my suggested course of action. But, I’m not – I find the different perspective interesting, gives me something to think about.

No matter how you slice it, it was a great day.

Even though the IT issues were ongoing, I managed to get some stuff done and I continue to make progress on the projects.

Then, I got a call from my manager, who needed me to “run something” over to her at a meeting – so I played “Kiki’s Delivery Service” and got a chance to crash an important meeting. And brag about my awesome lunch (5spice chicken with peanut sauce – woo!).

Had a funny moment during lunch – right into reading my book, you know, to the exclusion of everything else, and one of my colleague snuck-up on me and scared me. Yikes!

We had a good conversation about zombies and what is going with “The Walking Dead”. Fun fact – apparently one our departments has discussion groups about zombies and “The Walking Dead”. Like, in-depth discussions.

And it isn’t my department.

I’m not even invited to these “All About Zombie” sessions.

Then we talked about my pen for a while.

I’m always ready to talk about my pen – it is pretty much the best pen in the universe.

I was feeling hyped up about the IT issues and wanting to try out a few things at home, so forewent the gym and came straight home. The beautiful thing about this was that it was still light out when I got home – which meant today is was light when I left and light when I got home! Lovely.

This also meant that I had time to put that quiche in the oven and chop up some tomato to be a different veggie from the carrot sticks from lunch. Fun fact – when my friend surprised me that carrot stick I was eating almost killed me!

I’m fine,I’m fine.

Dinner was excellent, even without champagne.

Then, it was time to work. Again.

And whoa, what work I got done. Things are truly shaping up.

Want to know what I’m working on? A website!

Cool, yeah? Me doing a website. So far it has 12 pages and has random headers – not a lot of content now, but the build is coming along nicely.

Another great day – conversations, learning things, getting things done and reading an awesome book. Makes me think that Thursday is going to be a-ok.

Book review: I Am Scrooge – A Zombie Story for Christman

“I Am Scrooge – A Zombie Story for Christmas” is written by Adam Roberts.

So, here is a fun, bouncy, violent little read for Christmas, if you are so inclined and fed-up with sugar-sweet Christmas tales filled with meaning and charity and good will towards men and all that.

A delightful and gory re-telling of the “A Christmas Carol”, Roberts not only takes delight in the story itself, but plays with language, breaches the fourth-wall and includes numerous musical and pop cult references.

Laugh out loud funny.

And the violence and gore is well done – not over the top, but enough description that those of us who don’t mind a little realistic violence in our prose, especially in the zombie-genre are well satisfied.

Props to go to Roberts for including some fanciful comments about technology, physics, time travel, the multi-verse and Dr. Who. Huh, these were some surprises that when I spied this book waiting for me on the counter that I totally was not expecting.

This book asks us to re-imagine the hated miser of Scrooge as humanities best hope against the zombie-plague that seeks to destroy us.

Fun, lively, spirited, gory, violent and funny – this is all I ask in a book about zombies. And it delivers in spades.

And, I know, I know, there are some of you who don’t get the whole zombie-thing, but you know, this book isn’t really for you – it is for those of us who are fascinated by these monsters who will bring humanity to its knees – yes, friends, this book is for you.

So, when you have a few moments over the Christmas season, when you rip yourself away from yet another re-watching of Season 2 of “The Walking Dead”, check this little book out – it is an excellent addition to the genre and must read for those who, like me, were hoping for more from other zombie books.

Early morning arrival

I got a speeding ticket!

It is my first, so although I’m not sure how to feel about that, I am deeply, deeply mortified by it.

When I finally arrived at my friend’s place last night (hi! do you still read my posts – look i’m writing about you – again!) I told her and she laughed and said “Of all people – you?!”

‘cuz she knows I don’t speed. Usually.

I admit, it was late, it was dark and I had just figured out the proper gear for the car and thought I was on the highway. I wasn’t on the highway. I mean, I was, just in the slow section of the highway.

Go figure.

For the record, I got lost 3 times getting here – all right towards the end and all times I realized it right away, turned around and went back. There is an up-side to arriving places super late – not a lot of traffic, so when I need to quickly turn and go back, I can!

See, there really is an up-side to everything…if you just know how to shift your perspective.

There is something incredibly comforting about being in the home of a dear friend who knows you well, isn`t thereÉ

Last night when I arrived, my friend put on all the lights in her place, like a beacon, so I wouldn`t miss it and drive by.  I did miss it and drive by, but that is very much beside the point. She offered to bet her boyfriend that I would get lost getting here and he declines saying it sounded like too much a sure thing…She showed me the essentials before getting back to bed – here is water, here is bread, toaster, glasses etc. Here is the bathroom, that is a shower etc. And gave me the run-down on the doggie.

I woke up this morning, yes I slept in, everyone was gone to work and on the counter – she left out tea and a book called “I am Scrooge – A Zombie Story for Christmas“. See – tea and zombies, I`m totally at home and comforted.

If only I can straighten out where to return this rental car – wish me luck!

 

 

“You must remember this…”

I mean I know I do – the airport waiting room!

Yep, that is right, it is time again for me to fly.

So, where I am going this time?

London – Gatwick?

Glasgow?

Moscow?

Kyoto?

Nope.

Alberta!

Yep, my friend’s new place closed a couple of week-ends ago and she has a room and bed just for me, so it is time to fly in for a long-week-end visit.

I’m very excited about it, and, you know who you are – thank you in advance, I completely can’t wait to see you!

Not sure how to explain the lack of words lately. Seems I got rather caught up in being my very best social self and making new friends and connections at my new position.

I love my new position, there is plenty to do and I have plenty of ideas.

I was recently asked to be Fire Warden of my little area of the branch and I also was invited to join “The Wellness Committee”, which is like the social committee, they organize a pile of very cool “spirit/staff engagement” things, like the recent gingerbread decorating house contest. For the record, my team won the “Spirit Award”, which I think was all about having fun and being good sports and all that stuff.

It is my fav award, so I was very happy. I got some fun pics too, so be sure to check out the ole’ Flickr account.

And this whole “making friends” business. Well, I realize I’m maybe not the best at it, but this is a whole new thing to me…I thought I was well on my way to making a good friend out of one of my colleagues over in the IT department. Every morning he would message me to say “good morning” and he called me “Sunshine” (‘cuz I’m all smiley and bright, I guess) and he would bring me random treats – rockets, an oatmeal cookie, some chocolate and we were chatting quite a lot. And then one morning we ran into each other and in person. And. It. Was. Awkward.

Like terrifically awkward.

He messaged me right away to say how sorry he way to be so awkward, and you know what? I’m a social awkward kind of chick, even with my amazing hair, so I don’t let it bug me when I have a social awkward moment with someone. I figure “Oh well, here I go again – being socially awkward.”

So whatever.

We start chatting again.

They we kind of stop.

Then, we run into each other and chat about the gingerbread house decorating contest and I tell him “I was trying to get my team to do a zombie Christmas, but I was met with these blank stares.” Which, if you are playing along at home, is totally true.

And this one little comment, this silly, socially awkward, typically geeky-bex thing, sets him off on a fan-boy rant. About zombies.

He generously decides that I need to see “The Walking Dead” and he has the DVDs and if I message him right away he will remember to bring it in for me…

Well. Alright then.

So I do.

And he does.

And I enjoy it and…

Well, this is where things get kind of odd.

I get into this conversation with another one of my colleagues and we really hit it off. And I agree to lend her a couple of my recipe books – she changed her diet recently and she doesn’t have a lot of support for a vegetarian diet her family is not in it with her, you know?

So, I bring in the cookbooks for her. And the DVDs to return to him.

And.

Wait for it.

My colleagues are related. She is his mum.

And we end up in these incredibly long conversations – we meander into Buddhism and she is talking about wanting to read about it and having a hard time finding books that are accessible and…

Well, I have this book in my bag that I’m currently re-reading.

So, I give it to her.

And today, there was a special lunch and she and I made plans to sit and eat together.

So.

I think I’m dating the mum of the guy I was becoming friends with…

Don’t tell me that real life isn’t stranger than fiction. ‘cuz it so is, baby, it so is…

Tuning in

Some people excite us and set our brains on fire. Others set our hearts aflame and still others open doors to us.

Then there are those that allow us to unwind, relax and feel oh so good about sitting around, eating yummy food, sleeping in and just being.

My friend I’m visiting is the kind of friend that allows me to completely relax – we aren’t really doing anything, we didn’t really do anything today. We talked, we watched some shows, we watched another scary movie – this one about zombies, Pontypool, which is a Canadian zombie film.

Yes, this means that with one film fulfills both Can-con and zombie requirements. Handy, that.

Yes, zombies scare me too.

Oh well!

Black bean burgers with panko-crusted onion rings are for lunch – yum-yum – then we try to go for a walk by the dam.

Too bad, the snow is melting, the sun is shining, the river is high and the ground by the dam is wet and muddy. We stop before we – please read “the dog” – are covered in mud.

Oh well. We got out, we saw the dam, so that is something, right. Right?

Back to the house and we flake back out on the couches – just pure relaxation, we share words, comfortable silences, dog-watch etc. This, this is what I needed. I’m relaxed and chilled-out and feeling fine.

I am lucky to have this friend in my life, who opens her home and her heart to me, who takes care of me for days and allows me the space and time to just…relax and take it easy. Hmmm, this is the life.

Surprise aural pleasure

Just heard a track from the new Annie Lennox album “A Christmas Cornucopia”. National Public Broadcaster played “Lullay Lullay (Coventry Carol)” and it is wild. Vocal harmonies and drums brought to mind later Miranda Sex Garden.

Odd.

When Lennox does it I love it, when Miranda Sex Garden does it, all I can think is “Bring back the Madra-days!” Yeah, I do adore a cappella vocals. Especially madrigals.

For the life of me I can’t find that tape I had – I traded a later CD by them for an audio tape of “Madra”. I think both of us thought we got the better deal in that little transaction.

In other news – I hab a code in my node.

No worries, though, people still think I look great. I’m convinced that when I wear the green sweater no one can see me through the green. Someone told me that I looked very “Christmas-y” today. Not sure what that means, perhaps that was a sly reference to Zombie Santa? ‘cuz really, that is pretty what I felt like today. Only less red. And less brains.

I am medicated now.

I mean I took some cold medicine.

The big concern – will I be able to get out of bed to see the eclipse? I sure hope so. Otherwise I’m going to have to stick around here from another 400-hundred or so years…and that means I may have to join the armies of the undead. Bummer.

Indulging in a laundry-Monday! Decadence, I know. But sometimes you just have to go for it.

 

 

 

 

Agape and surving zombie attacks

No one talks about agape anymore. I mean, I never hear people talk agape. Our society is full of eros, where is the agape?

Reminded today of conversation I had while living in the mountains – mentioned to a friend of mine that really, so many of our problems and personal issues could be solved if we could only extend agape to ourselves. If we could love ourself like we love our neighbour or a stranger. Or an animal. I can could love me the way I love you, if I could accept me they way I can accept you, well, I’d be a happier, better loved person, would I?

It is easy to love a rock or speck of dust, get lost in the beauty of grapefruit and feel connected to everything – to see everything as a beautiful, unique expression and just love it.

To feel that same emotion towards ourselves, that same level of acceptance and compassion. If I saw my best friend dating someone who treated them the way I sometimes treat and think about myself, I would say to them “You can do better.”

I want to love myself the way I love that speck of dust, that rock, that tree, that other human being.

Agape.

And you know, I think in the event of a zombie attack, a machete is better. You would have to spend a lot of time looking for bullets if you had a gun.

Thanks to that writer at Cracked who pointed this one out.

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Jane Austin and Seth Grahame-Smith

“Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: The Classic Regency Romance – Now with Ultraviolent Zombie Mayhem!”

Yes, the zombies were the reason that I finally read this book.  You read what you want to read -  I’ll stick with the zombies.

This book has everything!

Classic story, clear and concise language, iconic characters, cinematic romance…everything.  AND zombies.

Me loving this book should have been a no brainer (forgive me!).

So, why did I breath a sigh of relief when it was over?  Why didn’t I love this book?

Arg!  The best parts of the book are clearly written by Jane Austin – clear prose, period manners and speech.  The zombies…well they aren’t very interesting and don’t add much to the story. The promise of ultraviolence -  stick to “A Clockwork Orange”.

Sure, Lizzie has been trained in China and carries a katana and has a knife strapped to her ankle at all times.  Sure, her best friend gets infected with the “strange plague” and slowly turns into one of the walking undead.  Sure, the use of a “modesty string” to keep her dress in place with she did a prolonged hand-stand was a cool nod to period. Sure, there are plenty of undead wandering about, looking for brains…

The problem with this book is it is neither romantic nor “ultraviolent”.

Shouldn’t the addition of zombies make everything better?

(Note to self – zombies are not Muppets!)

The zombies are boring.  The violence is boring.

I can’t figure out if it is because zombies don’t lend themselves to page very well (too much time eating brains and not enough time nurturing brains?) Or if Mr. Grahame-Smith had a great idea but poor execution.

This book wasn’t even funny, and really if you can’t scare me, at least make me laugh.

I will not lend this book to a friend.

I can’t wait to see the movie!