Book review: Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother

“Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother” is written by Amy Chua, published by The Penguin Press

Been meaning to read this one for a while – received a lot of press recently and caused something of a stir in terms of creating a dialogue about different parenting styles and how the author was supposedly endorsing a specific way of parenting. The backlash against this book was pretty intense for a while there and seems to have touched something of a chord in a lot of parents about how to best raise children.

This book, contrary to the interviews I heard and other reviews, isn’t a book about how to raise children in accordance with “Chinese parenting” styles, rather it is a book about one mother and her two children and their successes and failures.

It is interesting to journey with Chua through various piano and violin lessons, auditions, concerts and the ups and downs of raising children to be “prodigys”.

Very interesting and intriguing read, but at times I have to admit that I’m not sure who I feel sorrier for – the mother who goes to tremendous amount of personal sacrifice and time to do for her daughters, her two daughters who by the end of book seem to feel resentful to each other and their mother or the father who is a mostly silent character in all this.

Chua does a nice job of defining what she means by “Chinese mothers” and what she means by “Western mothers”, which is much-needed in a book talking about cultural differences in parenting and she rightly points out that “Chinese mothers” aren’t limited to females of Chinese descent, but rather means a greater group of parents who are more structured, more militant than the average permissive parent that seems to abound in today’s current society in USA and Canada.

I liked it.

Chua offers some interesting insights and some interesting views about parent-child relationships and how children learn to become adults themselves including how the parent-child relationship changes over time. Cleverly, she provides an interesting tension in the differences between her two daughters, the elder one who is responsive and obedient and the younger, rebellious one.

Chua shows that what works for one child, for some children will be the complete downfall of another. Interestingly, she almost completely destroys the relationship with both children in the process, but she gets there and learns her lesson.

About mid-way through the book, Chua starts dealing with a sister who is diagnosed with a rare form of aggressive leukemia, which provides an extra layer of interest and tension to her family dynamic and struggles to raise her two daughters.

Enjoyable kind of read, but not exactly what all the hype was about. This was less a book about how to raise your children in accordance with Chinese parenting practices and more about how every child and family is unique, she ends up making more of a case for birth order psychology than for parenting style.

Good read, especially you have four hours and are interested in stories about parenting styles, but now after reading, have to say that it wasn’t a book that was true to its hype.

Or maybe I missed the point again.

Book review: The Gum Thief by Douglas Coupland

“The Gum Thief” by Douglas Coupland

Oh, hey I read a book this morning.

I feel kind of silly writing a review for this book, first, this book is about 5 years old and Coupland has continually evolved since writing this. One of the works that I plan to take a closer listen to is his 2010 CBC Massey Lectures “Player One: What is to Become of Us”. I heard about 2 hours (not in a row, but total) of the 4 hours and it sounded intriguing, so, yes, going to check it out.

But back to the book at hand. Ok, in my overnight bag.

Reading this book I had this really funny feeling that I read it before and even wrote a review for it.

I double checked – I hadn’t.

But it seemed just, very, very familiar. So I’m not sure what that is about.

I enjoyed it.

One of the things I like best about it is how Coupland plays with the narrative style. He writes stories within stories and short stories with novels and layers the plot so that it becomes unclear as to what is really going on.

He manipulates language in fun, witty and interesting ways and his characters volley back and forth. Love the fresh imagery and break down of the structure of a novel.

One of my fav things about reading Canadian authors is sometimes, sometimes I recognize the geography, the landmarks, the unique Canadian “voice” – Coupland brings it.

Funny thing about this book is, really, for a satisfying read, not much happens. Seriously, if you are looking for a book when people change, learn things, grow etc. if that is how you like your novels and characters then move along – this book isn’t for you.

Me, I’m good, give me a book that is clever, entertaining, uses language in a new and interesting ways and I’m good, very good.

Not a “must read”, but an “I’m really glad I read this”.

Book review: Nakedby David Sedaris

“Naked” by David Sedaris

Oh, look another book review.

I really like Sedaris, this is the second book I’ve read by him, the first being “Me Talk Pretty One Day” and he is hilarious, laugh-out-loud-on-the-train funny.

In this book, Sedaris tells a series of autobiographical short stories about growing up, his family and various “adventures” hitch-hiking across the USA. Of course, this being Sedaris nothing is ever “normal” or straightforward – the hitch-hiking is with his quadriplegic best friend, his mother does impressions of his various ticks and behaviours as she serves his teachers drinks when they express concern about his troubling behaviour (licking light switches among them) and celebrating a family wedding in the face of death.

Sedaris is a funny, funny guy, a contributor on National Public Radio and has won numerous awards for his writing – none of these being reasons you should read this book.

It is a funny book, by a funny guy and as someone who loves short stories, I am a huge fan of how he organizes his books – these are short, funny, touching cat-naps for the brain and body.

Of course, I see that this book was published back in 1997, so you may have already read it. Oops! Sorry for being so late!

 

Book review: Snow Flower and the Secret Fan

“Snow Flower and the Secret Fan” – by Lisa See, published in 2005.

This book was recommended to me by my friend Laura, who in a very short time taught me much about being and having good friends who are women, thanks Laura.

This book is about the life-long friendship between two women in 19th Century China, following them from girls, when they become “same olds” and through their lives, the agonies of foot-binding, the joy of marriage, the disappointment of marriage, traditions regarding families, child-bearing and through an unexpected and bitter misunderstanding that tears them apart.

This is a fascinating look at the fascination relationship between two women and the relationships of these women with other women in their lives – their mothers, the matchmaker, mothers-in-law, sisters, other women in the household and villages.

Of special interest is the method of communication – a secret written language, used only by women called nu shu, unique as the only written language solely used by women.

See does a great job of expressing the inner life of the main characters and how they see the world and how they navigate their personal lots in life – the characters are believable and true, without being overly romantic or sentimental. The characters are flawed and realistic and as they grow, they gain deeper understanding into themselves, the world around them and their place in it.

I’ve never read a book about women in China in this time, this being my first, I have to say how enjoyable it was, a pleasurable way to spend a mid-morning to early afternoon indeed. If you have ever wondered about the friendships of women in societies controlled by men, where their movements are restricted and where the spheres of the public and private are separate I highly suggest picking up this book.

Very enjoyable.

“Three Cups of Tea: One Man’s MIssion to Promot Peace…One School at a Time” book review

non-fiction by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin

I don’t know why I keep calling these “reviews”. It is more like “Hey, I read this book and here is what I think.” I don’t know the word for that, so if someone knows let me know and then I will stop calling these reviews.

This book is a really personal read – passed to me by a friend with the suggestion that I read and enjoy. There is a special place in my heart for books that people pass along to me – I don’t much about anatomy, but I think it is somewhere near the left ventricle. I love being handed a book and told to “Go read.” I imagine it is like a wild animal being let loose back in their natural environment.

Mortenson and Relin bring together in this book two of my favourite things – climbing and learning. True story too.

Mortenson’s adventure into building schools begins with his  failed attempt to climb K2.

He is saved by his porter (we know them as Sherpas on Everest) and nursed back to health in a small remote village. He gets to know some locals, promises to return someday and build a school for the children. A year later – he does.

From there the book documents his adventures while trying to build schools for the children of Pakistan and Afghanistan. His efforts take him on a journey through meeting famous climbers and Alpinist, meeting villagers, learning how to pray, gaining a loyal body-guard, making friends for life, meeting Mary Bono in Washington, meeting war lords, seeing some of his first graduates. As time goes on the project that began as one school in a remote mountain community morphs into building women’s centres, paying teachers employed by governments who don’t pay them, proving scholarships for students who attended the village communities.

Everywhere he goes, he makes friends with unlikely people, wins allies and makes a lot of promises to build a lot of schools. He keeps every single promise. Where schools are knocked down by bombs, they re-build, as some elements try to stop the building, citing that is it is immoral for girls to be educated, they find more reasonable people who want girls educated.

I’m really bad at expressing how deeply affected I am by this book.

I dream about climbing sometimes when I sleep. Sometimes when I’m on the wall I think about rock, thing about going up and coming back down.  I’m not and will never be a high-altitude climber – I get altitude sick. And am afraid of heights, so I guess that lets you know how much of an ace climber I am. When you hear about climbers in the media you don’t hear about many things – you don’t hear about the failed attempts, the high-altitude blindness, the way the heart can rupture in the chest and the how badly a climb attempt can go.

Mortenson’s attempt was an incredible failure. He turned it into something beautiful. He continues to turn it into something beautiful.

Some of my fav things are in this book – climbing, education, learning and social justice. The compassion this man feels goes all the way through the book like mountain stream.

If you buy this book, then buy it through the website: http://www.threecupsoftea.com/

They donate 7% of your purchase to Mortensen’s foundation and they use the money to build schools, teaching children, especially girls.

Yeah, this is must read.

I cried and sniffed my way through much of the book – it really moved me.

I am in great debt to the friend who told me to read this book.

“World Without End” – book review

A novel by Ken Follett, sequel to “Pillars of the Earth”, set two-hundred years after.

This book was passed along to me by a friend who suggested I give it a read.

I have to admit that the event that happens early in the books pages, that serves to connect the four children who follow throughout their life-times – I kinda stopped caring about it by about half-way through the book. When I found out the secret, I was long past caring.

Beginning in 1327, the story follows four children through their life-times in the town of Knightsbridge. I didn’t read the first book, but this hardly matters – the two-hundred year gap between books pretty much means either book stands on its own or they perhaps are better considered companion books?

The characters, all the characters, were well-written and three-dimensional. The settings precise and it is clear that a lot of care and research went into this book and creating a very realistic account of the times and trials in the 14th century. Most notable is the attention to detail about architecture, arts, the wool-trade, the development of medical knowledge and feudal politics. I now know more about 14th architecture than I ever cared to know – I guess that means that my interests are pretty limited.

Alas! I will never be a true “Renaissance Man”.

Really.

What I like best about this book was the characters and how Follett was true to them. He captures, especially lovingly, the character of Caris, who as a young girl declares an impossible goal in 14th century England – to become a doctor.

The most surprising thing about this book was the amount of sex in it. I have nothing against a book having a lot of sex in it – you can see my review of “Fool: A Novel”, by Christopher Moore as proof (also as proof, readings of Nin, de Sade and Von Sacher Masoch etc),  it just got me off guard as I wasn’t expecting a book set in the 14th century to have this much sex in it.

On reflection, it makes perfect sense – people are pretty focused on sex and it is only our post-Victorian lives that lead us to think that, historically, people were not as interested in sex as we are now. Made me feel foolish and innocent.

Which was a bit of bonus, I guess.

I don’t meant to imply that sex was the main thing about this book, it was just very honest about being a motivator to what people did, how they acted and something that mattered to them.

One of the things that I liked best about this book was the amount of non-heterosexual characters and relationships and that they were dealt with in a practical, no-nonsense sort of way. In a novel of historical fiction, it was refreshing and honest and however else I felt about this book, I have a lot of respect for Follett for making sure to include these characters and relationships in his book – it felt like he was lending his voice to oft forgotten parts of history – some social justice to go with your fiction? Yes please.

Unfortunately for me, I read it after already slogging through another piece of historical commentary set in a later time and a riotous novel set pre-14th century, by the time I was halfway through this book, I kinda just wanted everyone to die of the plague.

I think this book deserved a better reader than I and I am sorry that I was not more appreciative. Complaining to my travel partner over breakfast while sipping a glass of champagne “I’m just hoping the plague will come along and wipe everyone out so I can get the next book!” is not the most intelligent nor sensitive comment a read can make.

It did make my travel companion laugh, so I guess that is all good.

I think I will try another Follett at some point. I’m done with the township of Kingsbridge so I will have to find out what else he has to offer.

 

“Fool: A Novel” – book review

A work of fan-fiction (in my opinion) by Christopher Moore, using the world of “King Lear” by William Shakespeare as original source material, kinda…

Most hilarious interpretation of King Lear. Ever. Me = laughing out loud from the author’s warning – when was the last time I read a book with an author’s warning? And in the warning that book included wanking? As I was reading beside my travel partner who was sunbathing and sleeping while I read, I tried my best to internalize my laughter – I’m positive that my hips have spread because of this.

This was my first foray into Moore and he did not disappoint. I’m not fussed that this book is, essentially, fan fiction, I read “Wicked” and it didn’t bother me then either, so there you go. I figure if people want to revisit and play around in someone else’s playground, more power to them – it only enforces the original source material as relevant.

Told from the point-of-view of King Lear’s Fool, this is a hilarious take on one of the Bard’s most famous tragedies. There is gratuitous sex, violence, murder, spanking, sex, wanking, swearing, comments about breasts, allusions to genitals, sex, making fun of people’s parentage and lots of sex. And a ghost.

I loved it.

Probably the truest version of what grabbed audiences at the Globe and kept them coming back for more Shakespeare. For me, Shakespeare wasn’t and isn’t about how deep and meaningful he could write (which, yes, he can and does) but is more about his clever way of telling a dirty joke, of timing laughs against tears and puns and poetry and keeping the audience interested.

Moore learned the lesson well – you want to make me cry, make me laugh first. If I howl with tears now, chances are I will howl with tears later.

This book was a screaming funny way to spend some time. If you need a good belly laugh, don’t mind laughing out loud as you read and aren’t bothering by sex, swearing and sex – this book is a must-read.

It also made me consider that if “King Lear” was taught with this book as a companion maybe more people would have a better appreciation and understanding of Shakespeare.

Something to think about.

Haha – WordPress thinks “wanking” is a spelling error! Get a BritSpeak dictionary WordPress!

 

“Room” – book review

A work of fiction by Emma Donoghue, winner of the 2010 Rogers’ Trust Award for Fiction, shortlisted for the 2010 Man Booker Prize and 2010 Governor General’s Award.

The awards surrounding this book were not the reason I wanted to read this book.

Driving home in October from Thanksgiving from Northern Ontario I was lucky enough to hear an interview with Emma Donoghue right after her win of the Rogers’ Trust Award. Her idea was startling, shocking and sad.

Donoghue writes the book from the point of view of six-year-old Jack. His voice is funny, fresh and filled with the concerns of a six-year-old’s frustrations, wants and needs. Slowly, the horror of Jack’s situation and that of his mother’s is revealed – his mother was abducted and kept prisoner in a one-room shed for seven years and raised Jack in this…room.

The journey is nerve-racking, a story of escape, learning how to live without walls, getting to know the people who love us – who are real and out there, waiting for our return to the real world.

Jack’s mum is a character to be admired – creating a whole world for Jack out of one room, surviving 7 years imprisonment, learning how to live again, reconnecting and helping a child do the same.

This book, also, reminds us that this is something that happens in our world – women are snatched away and kept away, alone in rooms, in garden sheds, in basements.

I loved this book. It made me sad.

“The Brain that Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science” – book review

Non-fiction book about neuroplasticity by Norma Doidge, MD – with help from friends.

Wow.

How could I not love this book – brings brain structure, function, neurochemistry and stories of real people together in one amazing and awe-inspiring read.

I loved that Doidge not only told the stories of the triumphs of people who have different “brain difficulties” (my phrasing, not his) but also very personal stories of some of the leading innovators and people working today in the field of brain plasticity – both types of stories are equally interesting, inspiring and heartbreaking, in turns.

Most unexpected thing about this book – Doidge offered the best insight and interpretation of Freud I’ve ever read. He neatly goes through Freud’s stages of development and explains how it is reasonable in a terms of neoplastic framework. I was stunned and impressed.

If you are interested in how the brain works, what is going on in current neuroscience, if you know someone who struggles with autism or has had a stroke or suffers from other neurological impairment or challenge or if you have a brain – this is a book for you.

I was worried when I picked up this book that I would be bored by the bits about brain structure – this is not something I was ever able to follow when the subject arose in psych classes – but Doidge manages to keep it interesting.

Yeah, this is one of those books that I suggest giving a read. It offered a lot of…hope.

“Anna Karenina” – book review

A work of fiction by Leo Tolstoy

I don’t think I’m enough of a romantic to enjoy this novel. My favourite parts where when the novel delved into descriptions regarding the economy, politics and the feudal system in 19th century Russia.

The love story parts  – well, I just didn’t like them – probably because I just didn’t like most of the characters. I felt a lot of sympathy for them, trapped as they were in 19th century Russia and all the social duties, expectations etc that went along with that. I think, probably, at the time of publishing, this was a ground-breaking, culture changing artwork – I can see that. Unfortunately, for me, I exist in a post-published-Anna-Karenina-world and the novel is not a new form for me – it is a well-respected, well-established form that I admire and love.  Unfortunately, too, I have no passion for Russian history, so even the parts that I found interesting, were less interesting.

I wanted to read this book and love it, having read other novels that refer to it in grand, romantic terms, but I’m neither romantic nor Russian enough.

Sorry for the spoiler, which, you already know, from the midpoint of this book I just really, really wanted her to get on with it and throw herself under the train already. And when she finally did, I still had two more chapters to go!

Ack!

Sorry. I respect this book and I respect the author – I just didn’t like it.